Love on the evening train

`

You sit 'cross me on the evening train

In your dark denims, and gray cardigan.

Your lips flush red with red lipstick.

You glance at me, and smile once, quick.

When he calls up – you hardly speak:

Your eyes are tired, your voice is weak.

The phone call done, you close your eyes.

The train chugs on, amidst your sighs.

Lovely you look, in your gray and blue,

Your dark red lips, large eyes and you.

How he must love those lips, those eyes,

That lovely nose, those eyebrows wise!

Yet does he really understand you?

Your lips, your eyes, your gray and blue?

Why let me love you while you sleep

For these few moments, for me to keep,

Before we part strangers again,

Who sat across on an evening train.

No, not your lips, or eyes, or hair –

He loves all that, and you do not care.

Instead, let me love your empty sigh,

The infinite tiredness in your eye,

The yearnings of your lonely heart,

And these three long feet that keep us apart.

`

Grand Central Station, NY, 

November, 2011

Water lillies

`
As it stands now, we need to speak only every third sentence in our conversations. We choose the most beautiful ones. That's our secret.

_____________

As we crossed the road, she casually clutched my arm.

As if it was the most natural thing for her to do.
_____________

She pulled the veil gently across her face, bowed her head down, and from her hiding, stole a long glance at him. He was still smiling.
_____________

Did you notice?
Just when I caressed her ivory white petal, the flower smiled!
Did you notice?
_____________

`

Monsoon

`
The monsoon frogs croak the language of my lost childhood.
_____________

Do not love my talents. 
Love instead my infinite loneliness.
_____________

All the songs I had learned to sing
It seems were for this day;
All those poems I'd read as a child
They seem so perfect today.
_____________

Do not hate me so;

You and I are one and the same,

Especially that part of me you hate so much.

_____________

When I finally gathered the courage, you turned me down. 
And I thought, this is what I had been waiting for so long.

_____________

You wait for me on the other bank. 
The river flows, and I do not have the courage to swim.

_____________

Do not agree with me. 
Accept me. 

_____________

I look at the moon; and all is well with the world.

_____________

The boy dashed into the room excited: “There was this flash of lightning,” he blurted out. 
“For a moment I thought it was daylight.”
_____________

And when at last I reached the top, I realized I was scared of heights.
_____________

`

Unsent

`
Dear Lily,

The other day, I was sitting on a gnarled dry branch
Right above the river. Doing nothing. This felt exciting enough.
And comforting. And furry squirrels arced about in circles and eights nearby.
Geese entered the water; one looked up at me, once,
As if to say something, changed its mind, and continued sloping down
To the tiny river wavelets. I saw a rabbit, moments later;
It was crouching; and gazed straight at me, rudely
Then scurried away as soon as I smiled.

They all had something in mind you know,
Something I would have loved to say to you tonight.

With love,
Me
`

East River Flats, Minneapolis, MN,

November, 2008

The way I love her

`
I am a selfish lover.

I love her
Deeply, and passionately
But that love belongs to me.

I keep it, greedily
Not even letting her know
I love her at all.

I do not desire her
And I am not her well-wisher.
I do not wish to talk
Or sit with her.
It feels uncomfortable
To have her around.

All I want is to love her
And be left alone with it

For I love loving her
Just like that.
`

Emon dine tare bola jay

`
Translated from the original song in Bengali by Rabindranath Tagore
`

On a day like this she can be told
On a day like this of dense downpour.
On a day like this the mind can be unwrapped –
With such a resonant note                                                         When the dark clouds pour
Under the sun-less dense murk.

None else shall hear what is said then,
Deserted and lonesome all around.
Just facing each other             Immersed in the depths of gloom,
In the skies the waters pour incessant
As if there were none else in the world.

The social order, it was all false,
False was this very chorus of life.
Only with my eyes            Sipping the harmony in hers
With my heart hearting all feeling –
The rest having melted into the darkness.

Who in the world would be harmed in that
If I could lighten my heavy heart.
In this monsoon downpour            Alone in a corner
If I spoke with her a few words
Who would be bothered by that.

Today the wind blows at such an anxious pace,
Lightning falteringly flashes time and again.
Those words that in this life            Have stayed unspoken within
It seems they all can be said today –
On a day like this of dense downpour.

`

Bengaluru, KA,

July, 2007

Lines between us

`
Creased across your brow
They bother me
Hesitant but rigid
With age
Lines
Now arduously diffusing
Onto your rosy cheeks
And from that corner
Of your eye
Like a dark nest
Fate
Scrambles them carelessly
Irritated
Lines
I had scribbled for you
Dishonest
Lie scattered between
Us, daring
To be crossed
`

Bengaluru, KA,

May, 2007

AmAr rang thulir gappa

(script guide - a: ajagar; A: aam ...)

`
Aj sakAle base rang karechhi
je chhabigulo
chamke diye phute utthchhila mane,
seigulo

se majAr kathA:

AjkAl dhhoosar man
thAi prathame
ektu kAlche dhhoosar dhiyei shuru karlAm
mAnushher rang dhhoosar, jAmA dhhoosar,
gAchh dhoosar, sab dhhoosar
kAlo dhiye AlAdA karA
jAthe dhhoosar dhhoosar mishe nA jAy
dhekhe keman lAgla,
keman maylA jena,
shahure dhhnoyAy ddhAkA

man keman karchhila,
chakh buje base thhAklAm khAnik khan

thArpar abAk kAnda,
jena bnAdhh bhAngla

bhese ela kachi sabuj
sabje jAmA, lAl tthnoth
kuchkuche kAla chool
gAl bhora shubhro hashi
sab spashhta
jena ei sedhiner kathha

khelAr chhale
lAl, neeler mela basle,
dhhoosar kothhay hAriye gele.
lAler phnAke sAdA hAse
sabuj dine neel AkAshe
Ami o sei hAsir sAthhe
prAn bhariye nilem hese;
ghure phire beriye khele
hAriye gelem chhabir mAjhe
kAtla anek khon


AmAr deyAl dhoosar
thAr madhdhhikhAne perek pnuthe bnAdhhAna chhabi besh kare tAngiye rekhechhi
`

Bengaluru, KA,

February, 2007

Dewdrops on grass

`
Winter and dawn.

And a droplet of dew,

Silent.

Clasps

Onto a rugged blade of grass.

Naive, I exclaim,

"How lovely the droplet.

How rugged the blade of grass."

You smile,

"Every drop of morning dew

Needs her grass to settle down,

And every weathered grass aspires

A moistened jewel in his crown.

Behold the lovely pair."

`

Pilani, RJ,

February, 2005

Krishnakali

`
Translated from the original in Bengali by Rabindranath Tagore
`
Krishnakali, that’s what she is to me
Dark they call her, the village laity
On a cloudy day, I’d seen her in the field
Her dark gazelle eyes and their dark beauty
Her wanton veil frisked the village track
Her plaited locks danced on her back
Dark, O however dark she be
Her dark gazelle eyes did I see

Dense clouds cast a dense murk
Lowed aloud a couple of cows gray
Her dusky feet scampered anxiously
All along the cattle-beaten way
Casting her locked brow upon the sky
Heard she the dark clouds rumble by
Dark, O however dark she be
Her dark gazelle eyes did I see

A sudden gust rushes from the east
Rippling the emerald paddy yield
Alone, I stood by the ridge
None else were there in the field
Turning her gaze, did she look at me
Know I, and knows only she
Dark, O however dark she be
Her dark gazelle eyes did I see

Just this way, the kohl-dark cloud
Diffuses onto the summer blue
Just this way, the soothing dark shadow
Paints the woods with her inky monsoon hue
Just this way, on a moist monsoon night
Sprouts within a sudden sprig of delight
Dark, O however dark she be
Her dark gazelle eyes did I see

Krishnakali, that’s what she is to me
Whatever they may call, the village laity
I had seen her in the Moynapara field
Her dark gazelle eyes and their dark beauty
With her wanton veil, she ne’er tried to cover her face
She hadn’t the time to care about her naked grace
Dark, O however dark she be
Her dark gazelle eyes did I see
Krishnakali, that’s what she is to me...
`

Chandannagar, WB,

August, 2004